


Eight

by Arwen_Evenstar



Series: The paths we choose [8]
Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy, star wars the last jedi
Genre: Anger, Angst, Angst and Fluff and Smut, Cannon, F/M, Fluff, Light & Dark, Love Triangle, Smut, fight, force
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-22
Updated: 2018-09-22
Packaged: 2019-07-15 18:20:09
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,031
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16068689
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Arwen_Evenstar/pseuds/Arwen_Evenstar
Summary: The bones that were broken became solid. Flesh that had been tared was now whole. Rey took a deep breath, feeling the burn and rejoicing. Her head dropped to the right. He was still staring: not of hate, nor of anguish. But of desire."Balance keeps you together. Keeps you on the Path."Rey felt the weight of every word."There is only the Force."Her eyes fell wide, as Leia's hand became too heavy. She could not breathe. She saw Ben, across from her, his face contorting into panic, his mouth opened, in a scream."REY!"





	Eight

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Reylo Fic Recs](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts?recipient=Reylo+Fic+Recs).



> Dear friends: last time you saw this story updated was in April. It was a long time to wait, and I am sorry for that. Between life and one finished Reylo story for our "Heavenly Bodies" Fest, I found myself bereft of inspiration for a while. It was hard, and I am still struggling, but finally I was able to come through: first with "The Bells of Tatooine" and now Paths. 
> 
> I am still not 100% sure of how this story will play out. I am not 100% sure if I will use drabbles moving on this phase. I am not even sure if I should call it "The Paths we choose".
> 
> However, I am confident that you will stick with it, pushing me onward. So this one goes out to my fantastic group of friends over at Reylo Fic Recs and the confidence they have placed in all of our stories.
> 
> As always, comments are more than welcomed. It is also the stuff that fuels the fire of us, wannabe fanfic writers. :) Enjoy!!

A bip. Breathe in. Another bip. Breathe out.

Rey’s mind wondered, afloat above her body. She could see herself, suspended in the bacta tank bellow. It was a fight to stay, for her conscience to remain by her physical self. She was fighting the desire to reach out and go to him, to make sure he was safe.

Everytime she tried to focus and reach for him, she could feel the thread linking her to her body becoming thinner. The machines would flash red alerts. People would hurry and shout commands.

As much as she wanted to go, she would be of no help. Not like this.

So after a few tries, she stopped. Waiting. Observing the comings and goings of her friends, surrounding her bacta tank while she laid there, suspended in that liquid warmth, mending what had been broken inside.

He was also broken. She was sure of it. But no bacta tank, no friends surrounding him. She felt guilty and ashamed of what she had done: she had consumed his Darkness, made it her own. Made her more than what she had been and she knew it. The question was: had he done the same with her? Would it be enough to mend him, her Light? She wanted it to be true.

"Look, Poe, her hand!" Finn pointed to the chamber, seeing Rey's hands slightly ball into fists and then relax again. Poe reached for the glass and placed his hands over it, looking into her face, waiting for a reaction. Rey could see the anguish swimming over his tired face, in the dark circles surrounding his eyes, in his unwashed hair, in the sagging of his shoulders. Poe Dameron was in pain.

That was when it hit her. She was also guilty of that. Of leading him, her friend, her General, on into thinking that he could have a shot with her. That they could lead the Rebellion, to overthrow the First Order, to have a life together. All of that she could see, stamped across Poe's face. Rey felt a pang in her heart and her body convulsed in the bacta fluid.

Finn ran to the monitors and hailed for a medical droid to analyse the outgoing data. The droid emerged from the side entrance and pressed a switch on the dashboard that was blinking. Shortly after, he announced his decision. "You will have to leave. The patient will have to go through another round of intravenous treatment."

That wasn't good news. Poe winced, ever so slightly. Finn held on to his shoulder and squeezed it, looking at her friend so still and calm within the fluid. Rey focused on her friend as well; there was something going in his mind that she could only catch a glimpse. Something related to their mission in Canto Bight. Something that he needed to tell her.

"Hang on Rey. Please, hang on, We need you. We cannot do this without you. You are the bringer of hope", Finn whispered to the glass, hoping that Rey could somehow hear him.

Rey twitched at the words. She held on to them, as she felt the blood seeping inside her. Her blood, but also his. She looked at the stars behind the glass, beyond the station. And wished that hope could travel to him.

_I am coming._

 

\----

 

A flash of light. Breathe in. A shadow. Breathe out.

Kylo Ren had disappeared into the sands of Tatooine, having decided to personally follow a lead on a rebel party. This group included the killer of Supreme Leader Snoke, the one called Rey. That merited the presence of Kylo Ren himself; he had demanded justice to be attained by his own hand and no other. So, he had travelled with his ship to the desert planet and engaged in pursuit, through scorched heat and wasteland.

Alas, he was lost in the endless dunes of Tatooine - no ship in sight, no signal to be found, nothing. It was a mystery, but also proof of the danger that the Rebellion had become: two Supreme Leaders, dead at the hand of a girl! Hux would made sure that there would be no third.

That was Hux's story, unfolding before High Command. All he had to do was convince them to give him full control. Fire and brimstone would descend upon the Republic and its minions. Retribution, he called.

But no Force underling would be taken under his wing. No successor, no "right-hand". He would be the sole ruler. Him and him alone.  

But reality was an altogether different story.

Hux had ordered the Praetorians to toss Kylo into the Tatooine desert, where the sun, the heat and the vermin would dispose of his flesh. All that would remain would be some rags and bones. A tragedy for the First Order, a fate for the Supreme Leader. To die on the planet that saw his uncle grow into adulthood. Where his grandfather was born. It was the perfect ending to the Skywalker bloodline.

He did not knew how many hours, days, he had laid there. The anger and hatred that he felt was only supplanted by the pain. He hissed, remembering each blow of the praetorians.

He had tried to drag himself, to find some protection from the heat, but he only got far enough to position himself below a slab of rock until he collapsed from the pain.

He was only conscious for a few moments, but it was enough for him to try to gather the scattered wisps of strength that he had, to try to open the Bond and ask for her help.

He felt her Light, swimming inside his Darkness. It had nestled there, like a small animal shielding from its enemy. Kylo frowned at the thought: wasn't its predator surrounding it? Why did it burn so strongly?

It was all he could do, to whisper into that Light, hoping that she could hear him.

Sometime after, he truly began to feel himself go. Felt it in the dried blood covering his face, heard it in the screams of the animals circling its dying prey, saw it in the shadows that danced in front of him. One of them awfully familiar, looking at him with loving, understanding eyes.

"Mother?"

There was a shuffle and some commotion around him. But the pain was making it difficult to properly see who or what it was. He felt sand in his mouth. Someone was turning him and a deep pain shot from his abdomen to his nose, making him moan. He tasted blood, welling up inside his mouth and he spat.

The sunlight hit him in full, the dried blood and the sand making him itchy all over, and even more blind to his surroundings. The heat was boiling him alive, so he was thankful for the shade that the figures provided while surrounding and poking him.

He felt someone rummaging through his clothes. Looking for something to steal, he assumed. He thought about the possibility to move, to stop them, but he had to save his strength, he had too. So, between the pain and the blindness, Kylo Ren waited, patiently, for his chance.

A slur of language passed between the figures. Amid the confusion, he could discern three different voice tones. Someone knelt by his side, moving closer to his face. Kylo winced, trying hard to focus, to look into the creature.

The figure focused in front of him.

She looked younger, dressed in white. Her skin was ivory, which made her eyes stand out, deep in affection and kindness. She was smiling.

Kylo huffed and grunted, disturbed, trying to blink and clear his vision, but it was too bright, to difficult with the blood crusting around his brow and the pain in his chest. He blinked again, trying to focus, feeling the crusts fall from his eyes. He focused on the creature before him: it was a utapaun, a male. The man blinked, his white skin wrinkled, his red eyes piercing.

_Its now or never._

He whispered a few words, making the utapaun frown. Kylo saw him hesitate, but then move his ear towards him. He steadied himself, thinking of that small animal, safe and steady, surrounded by the Dark, twisting pool. He harnessed the small amount of Force he felt in him.

"Obey"

The red eyes of the man widened and trembled. Kylo felt his grip on his arm, tightening, fighting the intrusion of the Force.

"Save me"

He felt the grip lax and the man turned to his companions, uttering words with a commanding tone. The other two motioned to their rides and Kylo could hear them grabbing objects - a clink of metal, something large being taken down to the ground.

As the utapaun turned, Kylo could see the glassy eyes, staring him back. And in them, he saw his mother smiling. It all went dark, soon after.

Across the galaxy, at that exact moment, Rey opened her eyes.

 

\----

 

Days turned into weeks. The machines kept beeping, like a beacon, anchoring her essence to her body. She mended, surrounded by all the care the Resistance could offer. The bleeding has stopped and the bacta drip is working, repairing bone and tissue.

The moments of consciousness became more frequent and longer. At first, it was only for a brief moment, enough for her eyes to roam the face of her friends: Finn, Rose, Poe, Connix, to name a few. Some happy, other relieved. She was unable to talk, responding to her friends with a longer gaze, an occasional blink.

Poe looks exhausted every time he visits. Although his responsibilities often carried him away on missions, he managed to visit her every time he was at the station. He sat by her side and whispered, like a confession. He detailed all the progress in securing alliances in the Outer rim; pirates, crime syndicates sympathetic to the cause, rulers, tribes. They were the salt of the Galaxy, dismissed by the First Order - but they could still fight and resist.

Poe detailed the meetings, the covert operations, the one time they were able to ambush an entire convoy of supply parts. But he never talked about the defeats. Never the defeats.

Rey looked at the window, into the vast blackness in front of them. Poe was murmuring his usual mantra, reporting another encounter with the First Order. There was a red star, twinkling in the distance, among the thousands, millions, bounded within that window. Rey focused on that single red dot, flickering; it felt like her own heart, inconstant, fickle, uncertain.

It happened, suddenly. She was listening to Poe and then she wasn't.

The room went dark. Rey gasped, wincing from the pain, and a trace of panic invaded her mind for an instant: were they under attack? She started panting, looking frantically for Poe.

He was not there.

Her mask was gone. It was only her, laying on the bed. No sounds, no machines, no station. She tried to get up but found that she couldn't. She tried to speak, unsuccessfully.

As the panic subsided and her heart rate settled, she felt it. The Force. The pull.

She stilled, her heart heavy. The Darkness in her trembled, as the Light whirled around it. As sure as a compass, her gaze dropped to her right, to the figure laying on a cot, beside her. To the pair of dark eyes, fixed on her.

She could see over his face the same pain she had endured and a strange form of confort settled over her. He had withstood a severe beating, judging from the bruises. A mix of purple and yellow, covering his chin, his eye. His nose had been broken in two places but it was now settled. He was thin, his bones standing out, his cheeks, hollow. His hair, once so shiny and soft, was now dull, and limp over his face.

But his eyes! His eyes had lost none of their intensity. And she felt it, again, that thread being woven at each unspoken word. The Light and the Dark in communion, singing to each of them. His Darkness in her; Her Light in him.

"Those that hold to Light, those that cling to Dark," a voice said, clear as crystal, ripping the dark.

Leia stood between them, clad in white. The years had been washed away and she was once again Princess Leia Organa, at the prime of her years. She smiled at Rey, whose eyes filled with tears seeing her long lost General.

"All are Kindred within the Force", she whispered.

Ben kept focused on Rey, as if in trance, the sweat running freely down his face, over his body. A vapour emerged from his skin and Rey thought of the beauty of that image, as if the Force itself was lifting the damage from inside, making it disappear in a mist, surrounding them.

Leia took a few steps and gaze down over them. First to her son, and she placed her left hand over his heart. And then she gazed at Rey, placing her right hand over her chest.

Something traveled through the thin fabric of her medical gown, and she smelled forest and flowers, the scent of rain. Rey remembered the lake in Takodana, the damp and the grass between her fingers. It was the same smell, the same coolness rushing over her face, the same warmth she felt in her heart.

Rey shivered as she saw Leia close her eyes.

"There is no Good without Evil, yet Evil shall not flourish. As my Limbs balance my body, so does my Path balance my mind."

Rey felt a jolt and a warmth, seeing a yellow glow rising from her and traveling through Leia, like a conduit. Ben's back arched and he screamed. Rey saw his chest alight, and her eyes pierced flesh and bone. His heart, and hers, beating as one. She saw Darkness, pulsing and oozing, pooling inside with Light surrounding it, becoming stronger.

The bones that were broken became solid. Flesh that had been tared was now whole. Rey took a deep breath, feeling the burn and rejoicing. Her head dropped to the right. He was still staring: not of hate, nor of anguish. But of desire.

"Balance keeps you together. Keeps you on the Path."

Rey felt the weight of every word.

"There is only the Force."

Her eyes fell wide, as Leia's hand became too heavy. She could not breathe. She saw Ben, across from her, his face contorting into panic, his mouth opened, in a scream.

"REY!"

 

\----

 

She opened her eyes wide and got up suddenly, gasping. Poe jumped and immediately reached for her, trying to support her fragile body. Rey was wincing, trying to breathe but all she was able to do were very short breaths. She raised her hands to her chest and then she tried to claw away the mask from her mouth.

“Rey! REY! Calm down! You are ok, you are safe!” Poe kept saying, holding her tight against him. His arms were around her, pinning hers in turn, trying to prevent her from hurting herself. He muttered into her left ear.

“Hush now...settle down, you are ok. I am here. I am not going to let anything harm you” he said, feeling her body going from tense to relax, her scent mingled with sweat and that myasm that goes with long recovery. He closed his eyes, momentarily, enjoying that close contact.

Rey started to breathe deeply, her chest still heaving but sure. When Poe felt her quiet down, he tested to see if she was steady. Satisfied, he went around and sat in front of her. He gently removed the mask covering her mouth and nose, all of this while noticing her intense stare. Her mouth was slightly opened, and he could not push away the thought of brushing his fingers over those lips and kiss her.

“Stop”, Rey suddenly responded, startling him. Her voice was rough, from being almost completely silent for so long. Her gaze kept fixed on Poe and he smiled.

“Glad to see that you are recovering. Back to reading minds, are you?”

She frowned and pursed her lips. Poe reached for the water on the counter and gave it to her. Rey took it gladly, the cool liquid feeling like velvet down her throat and giving them a moment to pause and reassess. “Thank you” she whispered, finally.

Poe took his time placing the cup back on the counter. He sat closer, his hands slowly moving over hers. Rey flinched, and he hesitated. When she did move, he relaxed, folding his hands over hers. Rey sighed, enjoying the warmth over her cold hands.

“Are you going to tell me what happened? One moment we were…” Poe couldn’t help feeling a slight rush of heat moving all the way to his cheeks. “One moment we were talking. The next you were spitting blood.”

She looked at him. How could she begin to explain what was happening with her? Of her connection to his enemy? He had doubted her once but he had been able to overcome it. Another disappointment it would shatter their friendship completely. She winced: not disappointment, treason. It would be seen as treason by everyone - but by Poe and Finn above all else.

“I wish I was able to use the Force as you do. What I would give to be able to read your mind right now”. Rey closed her eyes, torn between confessing everything and not wanting to break from the feeling of that contact. How that Dark part of her relished on that small connection, wanting to use it to its advantage, to make Poe do her bidding, quench the desire that had been left by that dark stare.

She saw the images, flashing before her: his battered face, his wanton eyes, his desperate calling.

No, she could not. She could not let the Dark in her win over her will. She could not let _it_ control her - she would control _it_. The time had come to stop the pretenses: she knew what she wanted and Poe wasn’t it. Sure, he could have been someone for her, before. Before Takodana. Before Ach-Too. Before the Supremacy. Could have been. But wasn’t.

Her heart was half empty and she knew now, for certain, where the rest of it was: in a cave somewhere. Leia had lead her onto the path again, a path she had abandoned on Crait when she had closed the door of the Falcon on him.

He had been trying to push back. When they had embraced on the beach, when they battled on the field, when they clashed in her room at the station. She felt that trickle of sweat again, falling from her chest onto him. How Darkness had sang inside, attune with her Light. And finally on Canto Bight - how he had asked for her not to shut him out. She had doubted, leaving empty promises behind.

Poe saw Rey’s eyes well up. Her cheeks flushed and the glow returned to her face, little by little. He felt emboldened and reached for her, suddenly. Rey could not stop him from kissing her.

As his lips touched hers, warm and salty, she could not completely shut him out. It felt good. Comforting. Homely, even. The same smell of coffee and oil, mingling with her own. Rey gently used the Force on him, trying to make him understand. Poe pressed further, to coax a more intense reaction from her, but she kept frozen on the spot, waiting for him to realize what was now evident, on his own.

He broke the kiss suddenly and practically jumped off the bed, taking a few steps towards the window. He placed his hands over his hips and shook his head. After a sigh, he turned around.

“This is not happening, is it? It doesn’t feel…” he turned to her “I thought that you - that we - could be something. I thought I had felt it. Even from you. And when I saw you in that dress, when I saw you hurt...”.

He retraced his steps until he was in front of her again, standing solid before her. Rey looked at him. He seemed like a man to which everything had been certain, up until that point. Now he was second guessing himself.

“Was it wishful thinking? Was it you, messing with me? Are you messing with me now? Making me think that it was just…”

“Flirt, like you always do. Lust, because we are humans. In the end...friendship.”

Rey got up and stood before him and she saw Poe widened his eyes a bit, momentarily impressed at her sudden recovery.

“I will not deny there were moments. Something inside me whispered the possibilities, wanting for me to give in.”

Poe forced the lump in his throat to go down. He was not going to like the answer, but he had to ask anyway.

“What does it say now? The Force, inside you?”

Rey smiled. “It does not have to say anything. I am the one who does the talking now.”

Poe trembled suddenly, feeling something shift in the room as she uttered the words, in a low, menacing tone. The sound seemed to muffle and he could swear the windows vibrated a little. He looked at her, anxious.

“Rey, what happened to you?”

“I can bring him back to the path. Leia showed me. Poe, we can have peace.”

His face was ashen. His initial suspicions were, after all, founded: there was something, a connection, between her and Kylo Ren. Something had passed between them, and thinking back he could see it. That ominous feeling in her presence, her behaviour, the pull. How much had she given away? Their position, their plans, the station!

Poe started panting, his hands balling into fists. It was too much to cope with, all at the same time. He could accept they were not right to each other, but of all people - why _him_? He felt that rage gathering into a storm in the pit of his stomach. He closed his eyes, trying to control it, to think of what to do - should he arrest her, make her confess what she had told the First Order?

Just before he could react he felt something cool on his temples and he jerked, alarmed, his hand automatically grabbing her collar and wanting to shake her away. And then he was as if struck by lightning. The Light. It was around him, _inside_ him.

He saw his mother, Shara. She was as beautiful as he remembered - young and strong. Full of life and purpose. Her hair, just like his - jet black. She embraced him and he sighed. It felt like coming home. His heart became tight and small, like a child, and he could not prevent a sob.

As another jolt of the Force hit him, the images shifted and he smelled trees and grass. He opened his eyes and saw an open meadow, and beyond a dark forest. He recognized Rey in the distance, her blue lightsaber in hand. Before her, Kylo Ren - clad in black in all his tall and mechanical glory. He would attack her, Poe knew it. She wouldn’t stand a chance.

He wanted nothing more than to reach for his blaster and shoot a hole through that pretentious machine. He gripped his mother tight, almost having forgotten she was there, but it felt like he was holding a different person altogether. He stepped back: it was Leia.

Poe frowned, feeling his heart squeeze again at the sight of his surrogate mother. He embraced her, the tears running freely down his face. “Stop her. She will die!” he said, looking at the two figures in the distance. His heart leapt when he saw Rey shutting out her saber, and offering it to the Supreme Leader. That was it: they were doomed. Poe wanted to move, but found that couldn’t. He looked at Leia, desperate.

“What we fought for, it was all for nothing?”

Leia kept silent. She had that stern look with that hint of annoyance, as someone schooling a stubborn child. Her head cocked to the right, and Poe saw Kylo Ren shutting out his saber in turn and offering it to Rey. Poe straightened, the tears dried, the anxiety lifted from his shoulders.

“What is this?” the pilot whispered, observing that strange exchange of a double surrender. The Force crept around him, preparing for another jolt. He looked at Leia, who was slowly becoming one with the Light emerging from the ground.

“There is serenity, yet passion. There is chaos, yet harmony”, she said, raising her hand to Poe’s face, caressing him like she would her own son. “The Path is set: the Force will provide”. Her fingers trailed his face and came to rest on his forehead “Trust the Force, Dameron.” He saw a flash of lights which could be cannon lasers, he heard the clash of lightsabers, children laughing and someone cheering before a final, giant explosion.

 

\----

 

When Poe came to he was alone, lying over the bed in the medical bay. He blinked a couple of times, trying to focus on the person in front of him: it was Connix.

“Oh what a relief, you are awake” said the Lieutenant. She reached for his arm when she saw that he was trying to get up. Poe grabbed her hand while scratching his head, disoriented.

“Thank you, Kaydel” he uttered, as if it was normal to call Connix by her first name. She stopped for a second, a red blush covering her ivory skin.” You--you’re welcome, General!” she replied, with a smile. She was also uncostumed to hearing her name said with such an ease.

“What happened, where is Rey?” he said, looking around the room. Her clothes, once neatly folded over the bench in the corner where gone. Her lightsaber, also gone. He looked at Connix “Where is she?”

The young woman blinked a few times “General, I don’t think you should be up so suddenly”. Poe frowned - what was she talking about? He put away the covers and then noticed his white medical gown and the mask on top of the small table. He felt the fabric, making sure he wasn’t still dreaming and pinched himself.

“Lieutenant, why am I dressed in these clothes?”

Connix hesitated, looking to the door, expecting someone to come in and help her, but nobody came. She looked at the com, over the bed. But Poe shook her hand and she knew that she had to comply with command. “We found you a couple of days ago, collapsed on the floor. Rey was gone, we couldn’t find her. We learned later that she had left the Station, using one of the supply freights. We think that she might have used her...abilities.”

Poe was silent, but his body twitched. His mind was screaming _Traitor! She will sell us to the Order! She will bring him to us!_ But his heart, however, was not joining in the clamor of revolt. _Trust the Force, Dameron,_ it said. If she was turning them over, two days would be more than enough time for the First Order to find them.

“Have we changed course since then? Anything weird on the radar?” he moved to the window, expecting to find something in the distance.

“No, Sir.”

So, no one had come. Still, it would be wise to play on the side of caution.

“You will plot an alternate route now, we need to move from position”. _Better be safe than sorry_ , he thought. But would that be enough to tame the screaming in his brain and satisfy his heart? He turned to Connix, forcing himself to focus on other matters. “Anything else happened in my absence?”

Connix bit her lip. _Absence?,_ she thought. “Klay’s order is now complete. We have all the equipment that was agreed upon, the engineers are testing it as we speak. The latest count on reinforcements raised the number to 50 class A pilots in station, Sir.”

“Did she talked to anyone before she left?”, he asked rising up and discarding his robe, walking to his own clothes, hanging in the closet. He turned around to a bright red Connix, gasping over his naked torso. Poe found it amusing, but only for a second. “Lieutenant! Did Rey talked to anyone?”

Connix hesitated, looking once again towards the door. Finally she slumped her shoulders slightly, as admitting defeat, and straightened up again. “Finn. She talked to Finn, Sir.”, she finally said. Her voice was strong, like making a point, but it also sounded a hint like confession. It seemed that there was something else going on, something that had been kept hidden from him.

“I don’t like secrets, Lieutenant”. His voice was filled with a dark tone that made Connix flinch. Poe kept adjusting his uniform, chewing his inner cheek. He looked at her with his sideway glance so typical of him. It would have made her smile if he didn’t look so beaten. She felt guilty of withholding information from him, of something that could possibly help the cause. It was unfair of Finn and Rose keeping him out of what was going on. Especially when it could mean so much.

“Yes, Sir. No secrets.”

 

\----

 

Rey adjusted the position of the ship, making sure that it was directly above the entrance to the cave, in case everything went wrong and she had to go for a quick escape. She shut out the engines and kept seated, silent, waiting for the sound of the ship to wind down, until there was nothing. Just the desert before her and the wind brushing up her window.

She remembered Jakku and what she had endured in that place. Out of all the suffering, all the turmoil and fight, she somehow missed the solitude, the quiet hours of dawn and of twilight. When a shooting star across the sky would fill her heart with hope.

Finally, she got up and reached for her backpack, putting it on. She put on her belt, with the saber firmly attached to her side. Her hand stopped over the hilt and played with the switch - better might not get to that point.

It was dusk, but still she was able to see the entrance to the cave. The Force had guided her there - no navigation maps, no coordinates. She had just reached for the commands of the small ship and followed her intuition, trusting those two flows of energy inside her, like each side of a needle of a compass, guiding her.

And it had brought her there: to the desert sea of Tatooine. To that precise spot.

She stood at the mouth of the cave: an almost circular entrance, covered all around by dried branches of some desert plant long deprived of any life. She shivered, recognizing its shape - it reminded her of the cave back on Ach-Too, in which she had fallen. She pursed her lips and squared her shoulders, as if to shake her insecurities away. She knew what she wanted. She was in control.

She took a step into the cave and her backpack began emitting a luminescent glow from its straps, lighting the way. There was a short narrow tunnel, going into the back of the cave and curving into what appeared to be an inner chamber of some sorts. There were marks of people having occupied that place at some point - there were rags and utensils, here and there. A broken pot, some straw and ropes, a bunch of rope and boxes.

She squinted, trying to see movement in the back but there was none. However, as her eyes adjusted to the dark and she approached the back, she could see some light and hear the sound of a fire crackling away. No other sound, no voices talking, no animals lurking. Just the homely sound of the fire.

She closed the distance to the corner and peaked into the chamber.

It was a larger chamber that she expected. She could see a small skylight, into which the sparks of the fire were rushing and she wondered why she hadn’t noticed it when landing the ship. In one corner, there were several boxes and containers piled up, covered with roughspun cloths and ropes - it seemed like a storage of some sorts.

Her eyes roamed the room, searching for movement until her gaze fell on the opposite side of the room, to the right. She saw a niche, carved partially in the rock, where a makeshift cot was made.

Rey hesitated, feeling her insides twisting with anxiety. Would she find him like he was in her vision? Hurt and hurtful? Would he have the same look of hunger and desire in his eyes? Dark twisted in that anxiety and it felt good, pushing her forward. She drew a sharp breath, reining in that feeling, controlling her impulse to reach for the lightsaber and ignite it.

She heard a faint snort, a moan and a rustle of clothes. And, quite suddenly, his deep, baritone voice echoed through the chamber.

“Have you decided? The expectation is killing me.”

His voice was hoarse and she could feel the acid jab striking her mind with the skill that only a predator would. But at the same time, Rey felt relieved. If he was this bitter, it meant that he had regained some measure of his proud self.

“You know why I am here”, she finally responded, after forcing the lump down her throat. And just like that, she felt something shift within the chamber, something in the air, making it vibrate and hum. And then it hit her - it was the Force, wafting from him, responding to her voice.

A log in the fire shifted, making the chamber brighter for a few moments. He saw him, then: he was leaning on the corner of the cot, inside the niche, wrapped in a bundle of black and grey wool. The sparkles of the flames danced in his eyes, reflecting the light and giving him a cat-like appearance.

Yes. Definitely a predator’s gaze. Hurting. Rey knew - from personal experience with all sorts of creatures on Jakku - that was when an animal was most vulnerable, but also the most dangerous.  

For now, he kept quiet and silent. Waiting. The next move had to be hers. She approached the niche, never losing eye contact with him. All sorts of thoughts passed through her mind, but she could not distinguish if the thoughts were hers or his. She felt anger and longing. She felt desire and shame. She felt hope.

It was enough for her to reach the cot and stop. He was at an arm’s length; she knew that he could strike at any moment.

“I could. But I won’t” he spoke, responding to her fears. She frowned and concentrated on raising her defences. He chuckled, coughing a bit almost immediately. “Don’t worry, you have the higher ground, it seems”, his eyes flickering to the lightsaber attached to her side.    

She squared her shoulders and clenched her hands. She was not someone who would take advantage like that.

“And why not?” he said, the words now coming out like venom “I would!”

“Liar.”

She was right. But insofar he would never do that to _her_ . He curled his body towards the wall, trying to shield himself from her words and _his_ feelings. Everything was in _order_ before her. He had a purpose. A direction. He sometimes cursed that night, in the forest on Starkiller, when she claimed his lightsaber for her own. He replayed it in his mind, again and again. And everytime it felt like she was claiming him. He _felt_ it. His eyes roamed to her saber - it was like she flaunted it, everywhere she went.  

She started removing her backpack and jacket, laying it beside the niche. She looked around the fire - some food, a bucket with water. Someone had taken care of him.

As she sat down on the cot he immediately jumped from his corner, his tall and lanky body moving rather quickly for someone injured. Rey startled, but as he slowly stretched his back, like something rising from its lair, she understood: the physical injuries were manageable, but the hurt pride and resentment was something else. He was unbalanced, still.

“You say I am liar but it was you who lied to me” he whispered, turning to face her. The way the light washed over her face reminded him the moment when they had touched hands and those images flooded his mind. Of her, standing beside him, his hand in her hand, and a crowd cheering at their feet. He winced. “You chose your friends, your... _Commander_ instead.”

He did not even tried to hide the jealousy. She saw it coil inside him, the Dark riveting and pulsing, wafting from him and striking her mind and body. The thread she had pulled and made him hiss was coming back with a vengeance - but it was her now, on the opposite end.  

She got up again, making an effort to control her impulses and feeling her legs rapidly turning into feeble branches instead - he had the higher ground now. Even so, she straightened, pushed her chest forward and raised her jaw.

“I am here, aren’t I?”

“I am sure it wasn’t easy to leave Commander Dameron behind. I felt him, _around_ you. _Touching_ you.”

Rey clenched her hands, seeing his body hunch - a dangerous sign.

“Perhaps you are here to claim a prize and return victorious?”, he shouted, on the verge of losing his composure.

“Aren’t those First Order tactics, Supreme Leader?”

In two strides he was an hair’s breadth apart from her, enough for her to properly see the damage Hux had inflicted. Her eyes widened, seeing his taunt face, the scar standing out, the dried blood on his left eyebrow. At some point it had ran down the side of this face. He had clean it off, but there were still some smudges.

He snarled, teeth flashing, the strike ready, itching under his skin. Her hand went to her hip and she raised her defences as her mind was rammed with the sheer brutality of the Force. Still, she held her ground while his entire body shook and his eyes roamed her face with frenzy, absorbing her features in heavy, deep gulps.

She could see her reflection in his eyes. That feeling of coolness invading her body, the Dark submerging under the Light that rose from within. She closed her eyes and opened them again, fighting back. Slowly, he stopped shaking and bit his lip, grunting with effort, until he finally broke his stance and turned around shouting in frustration and hitting the wall with his fist. Rey gasped and breathed deep, catching her breath. For a moment, she thought she could faint and her limbs shook from the effort.

He turned around suddenly and she fought to compose herself. There was also pride left in her, she could not fail now. She pursed her lips and held her position, taking some comfort in seeing his indecision. The feelings crossing his face were so quick and different, Rey thought she could see a thousand strangers in front of her.

“I felt your pain. All of it.”

He froze, his eyes softening for a second and he twitched.

“What happened?”

He kept still and Rey felt him deciding. A surge of pain, disgust, fear, and anger. “They left me here. To die. To fit with Hux’s story. To become a martyr, dead at the hands of terrorist Rebels” he started, fixing his eyes in some point in the horizon.

“It is all the justification they need to move over the New Republic”, she retorted, anger taking over, Dark spreading over her shoulders, rising.

“I could care less for your Republic. Let them all burn. They deserve it.”

“And your Order doesn’t?”

At each spoken word he would close the distance between them once more. He was taking pleasure of touching a subject that would leave her annoyed. He liked to see her angry; he believed that was when your true self could be revealed.

“I remember telling you they should all burn.”

“Yes, I remember it well. And I suffered for it.”

He growled and pushed her arm, ramming her against the wall. She winced, but could not react as he pinned her against the hard surface of the chamber, grabbing her wrists and pressing them firmly against the wall. She squirmed, trying to break free from his powerful grip.

“And I didn’t?” he hissed at her ear, his breath inches away from her neck. “I offered you the galaxy, and all that I was left with was the feeling of _him_ drawing near you. I had to endure every beating of your heart, every pound of lust every time your eyes roamed him, thinking of the possibilities.”  

It was almost too much to bare, his weight over her body, his scent driving a spear that nestled between her legs. She could not help to draw out a small whimper. His hands left her wrists and started moving up her arms, over her shoulders.

“How is it like now, scavenger? Doesn’t it feel good now, the Dark? Here, with me.”

He drew back an inch, his hands now frantic, reaching her neck and slightly squeezing it - he could snap her like twig if he so wished. It would be easy and it will all end - he would take her ship and kill Hux. He would be in control, again.

Her breath was ragged and warm over him. Her hair had become loose at some point and it was framing her face in an ordered disarray. He could not help it, he needed to trace her lips with his fingers, the warmth of her breath filling up the tear inside of him, pushing his resentment away. As he looked into her eyes, he felt a peace he hadn’t felt since he was a small child.

“Doesn’t it feel good now, Ben, the Light?” she whispered.

His eyes widened before crushing his lips against hers, taking her by surprise. His tongue, wet,  breaking her defences and founding hers, ready and willing. She reached for his collar and pushed it, violently. She felt his hands reaching for her tunic and something ripped. She felt the cold and damp of the chamber hitting her chest, as he continued ravaging her mouth with an urgency that made her out of breath.

She moaned, in protest, and bit his lip to force him to stop. He pulled out momentarily, feeling the silver taste of blood on his mouth. Never had she seen him so focused; not the look of a predator, but not gentle either. A hint of lust, a part of passion, half devotion, whole intensity. She felt him pouring himself in her mind, warm, liquid, sweet, trailing down to her thighs, to the cleft between her legs.

A chill went up her back as his dry hands pushed away the remnants of her tunic, falling at her feet. With calculation, his hand moved across her collarbone, over her breast band, down to her belly, and over the belt which he unclasped unceremoniously. The promise of intensity and power was being held with a tight leash: she felt it, rumbling inside him, as it invaded her body.

A snarl escaped her lips as she tore away his tattered vest, already fraying at the seems, exposing the chest that had made her blush, so long ago. Not anymore. She took it all in: his scars and bruises, his muscles chiseled over his fair skin.

Without hesitating, she ran her hands up his battered body, remembering how it had felt on the beach, so many months ago. She focused on the Light in her core, mingled with that Dark warm liquid of his, pushing, releasing it through her arms, her hands, her fingers, into his own skin. He blinked and he drew a sharp breath, not expecting that invasion to be so blunt and powerful. His lips parted and he sighed like a man who had just quenched his thirst after a very long time in the desert sea.

His hands came to her arms suddenly as he regained his focus, pushing all his intensity on her, making her gasp. The leash was about to snap.

“Rey” he said, hoarsely. His lips trembled as he grabbed the front of her breast band and pulled, ripping it. Her small breasts bounced free of the constraints, voluptuous, proud in its natural form. His hand immediately reached for her back and he crushed his body against her, with the other hand cupping her face and pushing her lips into his. Their tongues battled, lost inside one another once more. She drank in his dryness, the taste of metal has she tasted his blood.

He stopped and grabbed her face, wanting to consume her whole, making her part of him, forever. They were both panting, unable to contain the torrent of Light and Dark that consumed each of them, swirling in the pit of their stomachs, in their groin. “I will have you. Even if it kills me. If it kills you.”

Her nails bit his muscles and she unclasped his belt, reaching inside, feeling him, hard against her palm, feeling herself unravel, intoxicated with the power flowing between them.  He sucked in a breath and his hands cupped her behind, lifting her in one swift motion, her legs immediately wrapping around his waist.

He carried her to the makeshift cot of rags, straw and sand in which he had healed. They moved in unison, aligned, balanced.

He sat and his lips were once again on her, trailing down her neck, her collarbone, cupping one breast and licking her nipple. He whimpered, tasting that sweetness between his lips. He shoved his hand between her legs, forcing its way into that slickness. She moaned and grabbed his neck, pushing him to her, fueling the fire inside. He came up, his eyes like gemstones, alight “You are mine, Rey. Mine and no other. And I am yours. Will it or not.” She felt her wetness underneath her, pulsing. “I want to have you, hold you hard, until we forget the Order, the Rebels and ourselves”.

Rey hesitated for a second, realizing what was about to happen. Dark made her bolder, Light made her stronger, but she felt like the same scavenger from Jakku. He fisted her head, forcing her to look deeply into his eyes. “I see now. It was you the teacher, all along.”  

His last words came out in whispers. Dark boiled in her cleft. He was primed, ready. She clenched her teeth and sheathed herself completely around him, her muscles vibrating and clenching, responding to the harsh intrusion. He opened his mouth, gasping, eyes opened and moist in an instant.

Rey felt pain, desire, pleasure, back and forth through them. Felt Dark and Light completely immersed, fusing - and stronger. _As it should be_. He gripped her and moved in desperate strokes, his mouth open in a snear - of delight and accomplishment. She pulled, picking a rhythm, lost in those estranged and new feelings. She did not recognized herself, moaning, or himself, grunting, as he pushed even deeper and faster, his muscles tense like rock.

He suddenly stopped, pushing her down violently, lost completely inside her. Her chest felt full, to the brim, her insides coiled. He looked at her, with trembling eyes.

_“From passion, comes peace.”_

She opened her mouth, unable to contain that spring inside her. He pulled her to him, claiming her mouth once more, as he loosened his grip ever so slightly, rasping her most tender spot.

A water dam breaking, flooding their core, heart and mind. They gasped, in unison, without a sound. Their eyes, minds and hearts locked. The Grey shattering through.

Ben stretched his hand, breaking the surface, into the Light. And welcoming it.

  



End file.
